Tuesday, April 19, 2011

The Ring

About ten or more years ago, I was helping my friends demolish the interior of a building that they were being evicted from. While smashing away at the things, I came upon a rock with a small glint of some metal exposed from within. What, I queried to myself, the F was this piece of metal doing in a rock? (which was most likely an artificially formed sedimentary rock, nothing special like igneous rock. THAT would be an interesting place to find something.) To answer my question, I wielded "the negotiator" (a 50 lb. crowbar) upon the rock, smashing it apart, wherein I discovered this ring.

Upon discovering my new treasure, I instantly knew it was now mine. It fits on my finger, I'm the one who found it, and it says "Allah", which sounds like my initials, ALA.

I do not yet know what magical powers it contains, I really should bring it to a magician and ask. But I don't trust most magicians, they do "disappearing tricks" to steal my things. I did manage to decipher the symbols on the sides though.

This mysteriously cubic symbol most likely represents a Christmas present. Christmas presents are hidden inside square boxes, and effort must be used to open the box and find the treasure inside. This parallels my smashing of the rock in obtaining this ring. The symbol underneath is shaped like a man, and is most likely Allah's partner, as he is holding up the wrapped Christmas holiday gift.

This building is none other than the home of our great nation's president, the White House. At the time I uncovered the ring, as well as this time right now, I was in the US. However, something puzzles me about the man symbol. It looks exactly identical to the man on the other side. Perhaps they are replicas of each other, or share similarities. Similarities has the same root as assimilation; therefore, they must be assimilated. They are made of metal, so the only logical conclusion is that they are borg. Therefore, the cubic symbol on the first side must also represent the Borg Cube.

This concludes this.


  1. Would you be interested in selling that ring?

  2. I have an identical ring. I was in La Mons, France, many years ago, and got approached by a very drunk Frenchman, begging for a drink. After initially refusing to buy him said drink, he took the ring off his finger and offered a trade: the ring for a cheap bottle of wine. I agreed. My Mates thought I was bonkers! Having cleared out a cupboard ( after my Mum died ) I found the ring again, but wrongly thought it was Masonic. Now I can see it’s actually Islamic. From the state of the Frenchman I doubt the poor soul is still going, but you never know.